15 Day Hospitalization with Pneumonia

 Hello Everyone 

I'm surprised I even knew who I was or why I taking this picture. My temperature was 104 by time I got to the ER. 

Almost two months after my mama died I wanted to share an update. First I want to thank those who reached out to me. Your comfort love and support means so much to me. Words can't express the gratitude that I feel. Life can prepare you for many things, but I'm not sure if one is ever truly prepared to lose a parent(s).  I said when my mom died, I was not okay. I'm still not okay, but this time is for an additional reason. 

They quickly put me on a breathing treatment soon after I arrived at the ER. This mask is so uncomfortable and it actually caused me to have anxiety. I think I was getting overwhelmed by all the air in the mask.

Puffy face and super sick. I didn't even realize my throat and face were puffy until the doctor mentioned it. 

Losing my mom, starting a new job, basic life stressors, general emotional feelings took a major toll on me that led me to a recent 15 day hospital stay. I just got home this afternoon. I had pneumonia and I didn't even know it. I was feeling sick that week, but I attributed being sick to the elements I listed above. The doctors were so taken a back of how sick I was, they thought I had the new variant of Covid (Thankfully I tested negative each time I was tested for Covid). I had a few doctors tell me that I was a very sick young lady.

I hate needles in all shapes and forms. This apparently wasn't my choice. 

The Sunday that I went to the hospital I was delirious with a fever of 104 and totally confused of what was going on. I was so out it that one of the EMT's had to carry me onto the stretcher. I passed out in the ambulance a few times on the way to the hospital. Later at the ER and during my hospital stay I was told that if the EMT's would've gotten to me a day later I might not have made it.

For those wondering I was on the critical care unit which is called IICU. Meaning I was really sick, but a step down from intensive care unit. 

During my hospital stay there was one day, I was mad. Crying tears mad. I felt helpless sitting in my hospital bed wishing that EMT's wouldn't have found me in time. I was hurting so much emotionally. I'm doing everything that God wants me to do, and I still end up here in the hospital. I honestly think this was God's way of saying I needed a rest. Believe me life will humble you or show you when you need to slow down. I don't think I truly meant that wished EMT'S wouldn't have found me in time because I called 911 for help. It's hard to cope when you feel your life's in shambles. 

I've never faked anything I've gone through that I've shared on my blog and I'm not about to start now. This is why I decided to show these photos me dealing with pneumonia. My hair looks like a birds nest and I'm completely exhausted. 

I thought about my mama and how if she were here she wouldn't want me to be sitting in that hospital bed feeling completely sorry for myself. Give myself grace, kindness, and understanding yes, but wanting to give up no.

Even though I feel my mama died far too young at 58 her life was a good life fulfilled. Her life is sadly over, but I know that she would want me to go on and live a fulfilled life and be happy. I know its going to take some time for me to be on the mend. I think my body is healing even though I'm still not feeling well. I want to rest and sleep. My lungs have mostly cleared, but I get winded easily. I also have to go for numerous follow ups in the upcoming months to make sure my lungs are okay. I can't write this post without discussing the amazing doctors and nurses that saved my life and helped me feel better. My mom worked in nursing, and like many people I feel doctors, nurses, nurse aids, EMT's, housekeeping etc are our unsung heros that don't wear capes. I was truly treated with care and compassion by the hospital staff. 

I was so happy to share that I found a new job, but right now I have to take a medical leave. If anyone wants to help me financially sustain until I go back to work, please consider donating to gofundmepage. I would greatly appreciate it.

Talk to everyone hopefully soon

Pilar